Always Drunk, Always Gay!!

On a side note we went drinking in this bar next to Tortuga verde as we wanted to drink and eat in some other places to mix up.  Ok the beer was cheaper.  There is not hardly any other places to drink or eat around La Tortuga Verde and this was 5 mins up the road.  And when I say bar I mean shack on the side of dirt road.  We drove past the bar earlier in the day and Tom said “yeah that’s a bar, the guys always drunk and always gay” so we laughed and thought that was an odd way to describe a bar.  So we thought fuck it we’ll go for a drink there…  We turned up at the bar and instantly knew what Tom was talking about this really camp, really gay guy who was really drunk, now I mean really drunk, he had totally blood shot eyes and struggled to stand.  We instantly knew this was the right bar.  We tried to explain that we only had a $20 note and wanted some beers, the beers cost a $1 and we knew getting change would be an issue.  This caused all sorts of confusion and we started to think we weren’t gonna get beer.  Luckily this other guy called Ever as far as we could tell stepped in and communicated that we wanted beer but had no change.  Basically he told the really drunk, really gay guy to and sit down and he would sort this out.  We got the beer  and ended up chatting to this Ever guy for about 2 hours.  Now when I say chatted, he spoke sentences in half Spanish half English and we responded in half English half Spanish… This interspersed  with Ever smacking himself in the head and saying fuck if he couldn’t remember the word in English.  It should be noted that Things was awesome as she understands a lot more Spanish than I.  It should also be noted here that Ever had drunk about 18 beers so was struggling to make sense.  We covered a lot of topics from farming as Ever had 2 fields of maize, to me being asked if I liked to cook, it actually transpired that Ever was not talking about cooking but was offering me coke (Cocaine)!! I politely declined but thanked him for the offer of drugs.  There is a lot of drugs in Central America, I have lost count of the number of times I have been offered cocaine or marijuana since being here.  My advice to anyone travelling here would be to politely decline.  The locals are not offended and everything is cool.  The conversation moved on we found out Ever used to be a commando in the El Salvordrian army fighting alongside American troops and that he has 10 brothers and 1 sister.  We also saw Ever's mum who comes to this bar as well and as far as we could make out she either gets really drunk and has to go to bed or Ever gets really drunk and she has to put him to bed.  All in all it was good couple of hours and we went back to La Tortuga Verde for a few more beers and a massive fish supper.  Good night, drinking with a crazy local, then fish dinner…..

By Stuff 

The following animals sighted at La Cuco beach are Always Drunk and Always Gay! 

Photos by Things